Neal's Choices
by notthemessiah
Summary: My First Fan Fic so please R&R! Kel's love for Neal is finally returned but he has some choices to make ok he hasn't made them yet but in time... Wrote this 1 specially 4 Isha tru fan!
1. Relavations

Neal's Choices

Kel trotted down the hallway. No one was about, not even her sponsor and current crush, Nealan of Queescove. Kel sighed, thinking of his gorgeous green eyes. But it would never happen. Neal liked her as a friend and fellow page-not as a lover. Besides, Lord Wyldon had ordered her to keep all doors open, whether in her room or a boy's.

The next morning dawned hotter than any other. "My lady you must boil like a roast chicken under those layers." Lalasa, Kel's maid sat sewing in the window seat. "You're right," acknowledged Kel, stripping off her tunic and continuing to practice with her glaive. Half an hour later the pattern dance was almost over and Kel had stripped down to her breast band. Lalasa had left to see Tian but Kel had a new audience.

"NEAL!" she cried "I I I had no idea you were here!" She bustled about trying to find her shirt, her nightgown, _something_ to cover herself up with. Suddenly, she felt a warm, gentle grip on her arm.

"No Kel. You're beautiful enough as you are." And with these words Neal bent down and kissed her softly on the lips. She was so shocked she had no idea what in the world was going on! Neal chose to take her surprise the wrong way.

"I'm sorry Kel. I know I shouldn't but…" He trailed off looking miserable. "I'll go now."

"No!"

"What!"

"Neal-I love you!"


	2. You\'re kidding oh so corny

Trouble in the Mess Hall

"You, you do!"  
Kel blushed.

"Yes Neal. I've loved you for longer than I can remember. But you only like pretty girls I thought you would never look twice at me."

"I do like pretty girls it's true. But you are the most beautiful girl in the world."

Kel snorted.

"It's true! But not only are you beautiful, you're intelligent, strong and you're not afraid to stand up to anyone."

"Oh Neal".

He bent his head again and this time she kissed him back with the passion of a year's worth of longing. It felt good. She kissed him again. Kel loved this boy, loved him with all her heart and soul. And finally, after a year, he loved her back.

The bell rang, startling them out of their embrace. They exchanged a final, lingering kiss, and left the room. They talked as they walked briskly down the hallway.

"No one can know."

"Agreed."

"We can't risk the Stump finding out."

"Definitely not. He told me on my first day here that there was to be no monkey business, to keep my door open at all times."

"I wish I could change his mind!"

"Neal!" Her heart raced. Did he really want to? She had never dreamed they would get this far. Not in such a short time. Neal noticed her silence and said that maybe they would wait a bit. This reassured Kel and she entered the Mess Hall with a huge grin on her face.

"What's up with you?" asked Owen of Jesslaw, a fellow Page.

"Yeah, you're never happy, at least not like this." Added Neal, with a sly glance towards her.

"Hey Lump" called her nemesis Joren from across the hall "You sick or something? I mean, I don't think I've ever seen you smile before. Ever." His cronies snickered. Neal growled and stood up abruptly. Kel and the others fought to pull him down again before Lord Wyldon noticed the trouble. It would be hard to say 'they fell down' if he actually watched them fighting.

Kel couldn't say this out loud of course but what she was really thinking was 'I have just shared the first few moments of my passion with you. Don't get yourself killed before I have a chance to share the rest of them.' Not that Neal would be killed. He was a better fighter than Joren any day. Kel laughed at herself inside her mind for being so biased. But Joren was older. Neal would have to be careful. They were in love now; she cared more about his health than ever before.

"Drink your milk."

"Yes mother."

Funny how 'mother' could sound so much like 'lover'.


	3. Whoops

Three months had passed since Kel's love had been returned and the couple were still as romantic as ever. Their passions were somewhat limited due to the Stump and their classmates but they did what they could, a walk in the grounds here, a quick kiss there. Kel knew Neal wanted more, the number of hints he had dropped since that first day was increasing rapidly, and for the first time so did she. She loved him, didn't she? What possible reason did she have not to want him? All the same she was glad of the anti-pregnancy charm that she had received the birthday after her monthlies had started.

The day of the Test arrived and Neal arrived in her room right on cue. But unfortunately he also arrived with everyone else, who always came to be checked over before an exam or other important event. She told Owen to straighten his shirt, and asked Lalasa to fix a small tear in Seaver's hose. Then she came to Neal.

His hose were awry. She bent to straighten them but hesitated. What would her friends say? She hadn't personally adjusted anything for them. They would be suspicious. She couldn't risk that. Kel stood up.

"Fix your hose Neal." The hurt in his eyes was almost more than she could bear. She dragged a stool over and climbed up on it to comb his hair flat. As she ran her fingers through his hair (something she had always longed to do) she fought the urge to gently kiss the top of his head. But not only were all her year mates watching but she wasn't sure she would ever get to kiss him ever again. Neal was angry. Angry with her.

An hour later they were both squires. What should have been a celebratory meal was eaten in frosty silence. Kel was pleased to be a squire but would have been even more pleased to share her joy with her friend.


	4. Let's Talk to the Horse

Kel ran down the hall and out into the grounds. The tears flowed down her face as she remembered the Arctic like atmosphere of the Mess Hall. What was wrong with her? Kel never cried, she was a stone, she was a lake she was a… She was a lump. Once again the tears cascaded down as she remembered how her beloved had once stood up for her. No. She realized what she was with a pang of heartache (?). Kel was a fool in love.

With out realizing it, Kel's feet had taken her to the stables. Usually when she was outside, Kel would practice or something but today she was more upset than angry. She had lost someone close to her and it hurt. She needed comforting. Kel's mother was back in the Yamani Island so she couldn't turn there. She could always tell Owen or someone but she needed someone who would listen with a sympathetic ear. She needed a woman. Or a horse.

She came to an abrupt halt outside Peachblossom's stall. She wasn't Daine, but she would have a go at talking to him. He couldn't say anything degrading to her after all. She fished an apple out of her breeches and offered it to the temperamental creature. He sniffed it then began to munch.

"Oh Peachblossom! I feel awful! Neal hates me now and I didn't do anything!"

Kel broke down and started sobbing.

"I wouldn't mind so much if he would still at least be my friend but that will never happen now! Why doesn't he understand-I couldn't have done anything else! What does he want them to do find out everything? He said it himself, no-one can know about us. Oh God what am I going to do? I love, I love him, I love him more than anything else but we can never be together now. He hates me. It could have been so perfect. Oh Peachblossom, I was going to come down here today anyway. I was going to talk to you, ask you to like him, to make friends with him, to stop biting him. But there's no point now is there? No point at all." Kel nuzzled her face into the soft fur on her gelding's back.

"But what am I doing crying here? He's not worth all these tears. I have to be strong. Yeah, strong. This isn't like me. There is no way that I would normally be sitting here crying. He's just some guy. I'm turning into my sisters! He's just some guy. Just some really…really…great guy that I happen to love with all my heart." And with these words Kel began to sob harder than ever before.

"I mean Peachblossom," she continued "It's not like he was only my lover. He's my friend, my best friend in all the world. I'll never forget how he rescued me from the fate of having Joren as a sponsor on my first day here. Would I be crying like this if I lost Owen or someone? No. I'm not only crying for my boyfriend but for the one person in this place who really understood me. I've always loved him Peaches. At first it was just like how you love your best friend or your brother. But then it grew. Yes, it grew into something much bigger. Our love was true, and strong. He loves me and I loved him back. No, I still do love him. When my love was returned it was beautiful. So beautiful. But now the world is dark, and will never be light again. And I hate this feeling. You understand don't you Peaches? Maybe I should take a leaf out of your book and stamp on him. Yeah, I'll stamp on him. Oh I'll crush him to tiny pieces, just like he crushed my heart. I'm so angry I could kill him. Or myself. Maybe that would be best for us all. I don't know how I would be able to cope each day, seeing him in the corridors, the Mess Hall, the classrooms. But I suppose we're squires now. Two knights come along and choose us as squires and I never have to see him ever again. I'll miss him. Not that I'm likely to become anyone's squire. Nobody in their right mind would want a GIRL as their squire. Mind you, nobody in their right mind would want to sponsor a girl. Maybe Neal wasn't in his right mind. Maybe that's why he loves-I mean loved- me. Maybe I'm not in my right mind, after all I am talking to my horse…" Kel trailed off despondently. "But he did choose me. So he must have some form of feelings for me. Or maybe he just felt sorry for me and wanted to rescue me from Joren. Which he did. He was so nice to me. And I was nice to him back. I trusted him. And now he's ruined it all for me. But I won't let him I won't I won't! I have to be strong. Stronger than ever before. Stronger than when I was fighting in the training yard, stronger than when we stopped the hazing, stronger than I've ever been in all my life."

"I love a strong girl."

A/N: Yes! It is alonger chapter! Anyway, thank you SO MUCH for all the reviews! I love getting them. Reviews make me happy. So press the button...


	5. Making up

**This chapter is dedicated to Incarnated Soul who wants me to update before she goes on holiday and Magewhisperer, my unofficial PenPal!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anyone. Even Neal. But if I did I would lock him up in a cage and feed him on marshmallows then send him out hunting every night…**

Kel jumped a foot into the air with surprise. "Oh my word!" Her hand flew to her mouth as she realized who it was. "What the hell are you doing here? Spying on me you perve! How much did you hear?"

"Enough."

"Get out. I never want to see you again."

"But I can't."

"Why not?"

"Because, Keladry of Mindelan, I happen to be madly and passionately in love with you."

"What? Then, why did you take offence like that?"

"Because...because...Oh I don't know. But I feel like such a Meathead **(A/N How original!)** for doing it. I guess I'm just so in love with you that I was worried that you wanted to break up with."

"If you were worried then why didn't you try to find out whether I still loved you?"

"Oh Kel you know I'm no good at that sort of thing. I didn't want to make things worse by probing and poking."

"I thought you hated me."

"So did I."

The two sat for a moment, reflecting. Suddenly, Kel realized she had a question.

"Why me?"

"Huh?"

"Why me? You could have your pick of any gorgeous girl. So why pick me?"

"Oh Kel." He sat down next to her and sighed. "Don't ask me to explain the fantastical thing that is true love. I thought you were the most amazing, most fabulous, most…most… WONDERFUL person I had ever met. I wanted to be with you as much as I could. And so I sponsored you. I wanted to protect you. I didn't want anything to happen to you."

"I can look after myself. I don't need you to help me survive."

"But don't you see?" He took her by the hands. "Kel, I need you in order for me to survive. I couldn't bear for anything to happen to you. Or to us."

"Really?"

"Really. Now I understand completely if you don't want to be with me anymore. Ever again. But I want to be with you. I love you with all my heart and soul."

"Oh Neal." She spoke his name for the first time. **(A/N Ok really bad song thing coming up now. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!)** "We're just ordinary people. Maybe we should take it slowly." **(A/N Oh god. So bad. So very bad.)**

"You're absolutely right. Are you staying here over the Summer?"

"Yes. My parents will be very busy."

"Same here. They're visiting my cousin, Dom."

"Is he nice?"

"Oh God stop making small talk."

"Sor-REE" They sat in silence once again.

"So I was wondering whether you'd like to go riding together in the Summer?"

"That would be… nice."

So that was exactly what they did.

A few months later

Sweating and panting, Kel reined in Hoshi by the bank. It was boiling hot and she was glad that they had decided to rest by the stream, it was nice and cool in the shade of the weeping willows. A few moments later, Neal drew up behind her. He jumped off his and came to stand next to her. It was almost the end of the holidays and neither of them had Knight Masters yet. But they weren't worried. It was too hot and pleasant too worry.

Kel flopped down on the river bank. Neal tied his horse to the tree and came to join her. Over the course of the past weeks, the couple had grown closer once again.

"So, what do you want to do tomorrow? It's the last day of the holidays?" Queried Neal.

"Dunno." Replied Kel. "I don't really have any plans.

"Well that's good. Because I made some reservations in a lovely little place that I in town."

"NEAL! I might have wanted to do something!"

"And if you had oh Lady Knight -to-be we would have done exactly as you wished. I am, of course, your humble servant."

Laughing, Kel pushed him into the river, only to find herself dragged down with him. Playfully, they splashed each other and shouted in the dancing water.

Later on, Kel arrived dripping in her dorm. Lalasa was there, on a visit.

"Lalasa!" Kel cried rushing to hug her. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm on a visit. And while I'm here, do you need anything mending?"

"Oh Lalasa! You don't want to work on a visit."

"But I love seeing you properly clothed."

"It's fine. Really." The two continued to chat as the evening wore on. Eventually, the subject of Neal cropped up. Kel told her the whole story.

"…And so tomorrow he's taking me out for dinner." She finished. A grin began to creep over Lalasa's face.

"And what are you planning on wearing?"

"I don't know. Whatever falls out my cupboard first." Lalasa made no comment which puzzled Kel as she usually told her how impractical this approach was. Later that night, Lalasa left and Kel fell into bed.

The Morning

"Kel, Kel, Kel guess what!" Neal burst into her room. "I have a knightmaster!"

"Oh Neal that's brilliant! Who is it?" Neal's face clouded over briefly. Catching himself, he replied "It's a surprise."

Kel was confused. It wasn't like Neal to keep secrets from her. The moment passed and she hugged her beloved.

"That means tonight can be a celebration instead of just a normal date!"

Later on, a package arrived in Kel's room. Kel shrieked with surprise as she opened it. It was a gorgeous green silk dress, with lace at the throat. She pulled it on. It was tighter than she usually had her dresses. And more low cut… These thoughts were driven out of her head when she spied what Lalasa (for it was surely her who had sent it) had carefully folded and put underneath the dress. A lacy green bra and matching thong confronted her eyes.

**DURN DURN DURN!**


	6. At the inn

**A/N ok my last chapter was rubbish. I admit it. Even those of you who said it wasn't know it was. But hopefully this one will be better. This one is**

After a lot of deliberation, Kel was walking down the cobbled streets wearing the dress. She was hand in hand with Neal. His hand felt deliciously warm in hers. Even as she thought this, he lifted here hand up and gently kissed it.

They reached the inn where they were to dine that night. It was small and quiet, quite unlike the other noisier, smokier pubs that resided on the same street. Neal had chosen well. When he stated his name at the door, they were led to a cozy corner where a candle glowed romantically.

They chatted as they waited for the food to arrive, occasionally munching on soft bread and olives. When the food came it was the best she had ever tasted. The clink of her cutlery against the fine plate served as the perfect soundscape for the conversation. which was hushed and loving. They held hands as the dessert was ordered and progressed to kisses over the coffee. Kel didn't want to leave. She didn't want this perfect night to ever end.

Eleven thirty rolled around and the couple was still as enthralled with each other as they had been when they first entered. They were so rapt up in each other that they did not notice the dark clouds rolling in, or hear the steady patter of rain drops upon the roof. They only looked up when the waiter came over to whisper to Neal that the storm had reached full force.

When he had left Neal turned to Kel with a worried look on his face. "We'll never get back in this! You'll ruin that lovely dress!"

"It's ok; I can take a little rain."

"Never mind you, I can't!"

"Oh Neal!"

"So what are we going to do?"

Kel picked up the menu, lost in deep thought. Suddenly, she caught sight of an advert on the back.

"Neal!"

"What?"

"This is an inn!"

"Congratulations!"

"Shut up! No I mean it has rooms! We can stay here for the night. I have some money; I can pay for two rooms."

"One would be cheaper."

"We've just had the most perfect night ever. Don't spoil it now."

"I'm not spoiling it I'm only making it better."

"Neal, I love you. With my heart and soul. When I'm ready. Not before. I'm going to get the room**s **now."

Neal sat, lost in thought. He watched her weaving her way through the tables towards the front desk and he knew he shouldn't have pushed her.

Kel walked towards the bar, going over the exchange in her mind. She knew he shouldn't have pushed her but she loved him to distraction. Maybe she was ready, no matter what she had told Neal. Her mind was made up.

**A/N ok ok it's waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay to short but i couldn't help it. i didn't want to make it too long and confusing so i made it too short instead. but to compensate i will update with a new chapter asap and you can just pretend it's all one chapter. thanks to everyone who i am in regular contact with YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE! please review but nothing about the length as i have already apologised. ;oD**


	7. SORRYSORRYSORRYSORRYSORRYSORRYSORRYSORRY

This is just a little note to all my faithful reviewers to say NO! I haven't abandoned my stories but I'm just finding it a little hard to update right now, my creative flow has been stopped. I also want to write a song-fic so if any of you lovely people out there have any ideas I would be REALLY grateful. And just to say thanks for everything you nice people have done for me here is an entire box of…DONUTS! Yes I am different, yes I am individual no you won't get any cookies from me! MWA HA HA HA! Shoves donut box into modem Ugh, ugh get in damn you….


	8. Proper Chapter 7

Kel woke to the sound of horse's hooves. Still half asleep she wondered which of the boys had gone out for an early morning ride. Ugh. She would have to get up and do glaive practice in a minute or she knw she would never be able to get back into the routine. She finally mustered up enough strength to open her eyes.

This wasn't her room. This wasn't her bed. She leapt up and ran to the window, memories flooding her mind. Good memories. Of her and Neal. She blushed. So that was the reason why she hadn't woken up in her own bed. In the distance she could just see a figure on a horse. She recognized his sloppy riding style immediately.

Kel hummed to herself as she dressed. She was happy and felt strangely at peace with the world. She gathered her belongings and took one lat look around the room. Satisfied, she closed the door softly on the way out.

Under the bed the pregnancy charm lay, its clasp broken.


End file.
